NUMBNESS

Chezney DaSilva-Gomes

Anchor Contributor


You never know what depression feels like until you've experienced it.

I have first hand.


Sometimes you feel numb.

Other times you feel useless to society.

like u have no purpose.


you can feel as though you don’t deserve to experience happiness.

like ur stuck in between reality and excruciating torcher.

stuck in this bubble of uncertainty, extreme sadness & depression.


we completely ignore the world we live in.

feeling disconnected from it and our bodies.

Those around us tell us it’ll be okay.

but it’s not okay.

and once u know that, there’s no going back.


I know I have so much to live for.

but the higher i fly, the harder i fall, the easier it makes it all.

to go down the all consuming black hole.


it can drag us down.

draining our remaining energy.

like a battery that can’t recharge.

the power level just keeps dropping…

and dropping until,,, there’s nothing left.


we may even be consumed by the many thoughts that run through our minds.

shame.

sadness.

self-hatred.

loss of appetite.

guilt.

loneliness.

emptiness.

ending it altogether.

what next?

you may feel lost.

even wanna give up and just get out, but you don't.

u might have lost ur fight.


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